Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
