OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
