"it" just moved
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
