Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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