there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
