and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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