Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
my shit smells like andre
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
