I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
