Need sex. Gaining weight.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
