Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
