You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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