idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
