we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
