you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
