he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
