I'm drive I can fine osifer
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize