I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
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