I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
