hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I lost the right to judge tonight
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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