I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
A bitchslap is in order.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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