Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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