The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
