she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
