If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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