Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
