My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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