Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
