i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I can't turn off my feet"
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
