all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize