You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
