i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
