I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize
