I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
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