Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
