i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
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