I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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