Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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