he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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