I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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