Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
