You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize