isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
