the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
