Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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