By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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