You don't have asthma, your pregnant
babies were throwing up all over the place
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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