if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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