Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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