I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
