No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
