If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I need to stop coming to work sober
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
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